Well it's just been one of those days. Last week was one of those weeks. I want to tell a whole bunch of people including yours truly to GROW UP. I want to tell a few people who have volunteered uninvited opinions about my life to SHUT UP. And more than once in the last 24 hours I have just had to stop and beg the Lord to SHOW UP!!! (P.S. If you get this blog in any form - it isn't you. I'm not that crazy!!)
I'm so tired. I've heard stories of suffering and heartache at rapid fire pace for exactly 23 hours and 20 minutes straight now. I'm so happy to be here for people. But really. I'm exhausted. Mentally I've got nothing left and 24 hours to go. In the middle of work today 2 of my friends are suffering the unexpected loss of their marriages due to affairs. They want answers and they want me to have them. I mean what good is it to have a friend in mental health when she can't do a thing to help? It's so frustrating. They actually just want me to be there which I'm glad to do, but I want to do more. I want to fix it. "All" I can do is keep handing them to the Lord. He has the answers and He is the Answer but my heart is broken for them.
And I've got a few unanswered questions myself tonight. It's one of those moments where I'd really like Jesus to come down here and drink free refills coffee with me at Starbucks and help me sort through a few things. I have complete faith that He has given me all the information I need for now, but I just want a few little pieces of encouragement that He's not finished yet. Life just feels a little bit like a commercial break lately. Sometimes I just want the Lord to physically be here to give me a big hug and say, "We haven't even gotten to the good part yet!" He knows what He's doing-good thing!
Well, I'm drowning in paperwork. Thanks for listening to me ramble. Just feel better putting words to frustration sometimes :) It's just 27 minutes til midnight and I'm claiming lots of new mercies tomorrow.....and maybe even a nap!