Today continues to be extremely hard. I feel better physically, however my spirits are pretty low today. Kate is having a rough time. Her ANC (infection fighting ability) is at 0 again today. Not a single cell to fight any infections. Her sores seem to be quite a bit worse and we can only anticipate them getting worse until her immune system is working again. It is heart wrenching to see her wake up and sit straight up in bed, eyes big, mouth held in a funny position. She points to her mouth, nose and tummy showing me they hurt. The morphine helps, but she never seems totally comfortable anymore. We are also battling taking her oral meds. They have switched all the ones they can to IV, however that still leaves a few. After much coaxing, I finally got them in, only to see her vomit them all back up a minute later. We can't put an NG tube down her nose again right now because of the sores and she is vomiting what she takes in her mouth. A very frustrating place. We are waiting on the pain team as they are going to start her on a PCA (a pain pump). We are hoping it will keep her pain under better control. Please pray for some relief for Kate today. It is horrific to watch your child suffer. I continually have to remind myself why we are putting her through this. The tumor is aggressive and we are having to take aggressive measures to save her. Save her. It is what we so desperately are praying for, that God would save our Kate. Save her body from this devastating disease. Save her healthy cells. And in the meantime save our hearts from being completely overwhelmed.