Wednesday, May 6, 2009

A lack of clarity

I've been a little BLAH the last few weeks. Just a bunch of little stuff going on-some important, some not. I'm having trouble focusing on well, anything! Evidenced by the fact that I've waxed my floors twice in 2 weeks-believe me that's not like me. I like to clean when I get confused and frustrated. It makes me feel like I'm doing something methodically and in order. Last night I folded linens as opposed to throwing them into the linen closet and the cedar chest. Again-I usually have better things to do. I can't really pinpoint what it is exactly, but I'll try.

My great friend Jeremy who is basically like a little brother has been struggling for several months in his relationship with the Lord. Lee, Cherie and I have talked to him until we're crazy, but it hasn't really done much good. We've prayed for him and loved him for months now as he's walked through his own valley of uncertainty. Last week Jeremy announced he's moving to Augusta to live with his girlfriend. Ummmmmm..........not good. He's leaving a stable job and living situation to move in unwed with a girlfriend and neither of which have jobs. He had to be out of his apartment last week so he's staying at my house this week until he moves on Saturday. We've had ENDLESS discussions about Christianity and if the Bible is true and if you don't believe the Bible do you have to follow it's guidelines etc etc etc ad nauseum. It's seemingly useless. Finally I told him last night that I don't think he'd be unable to sleep and asking a million questions if he really had peace about where he was with the Lord currently. He agreed, but said he's going his own way anyway. Running from God is great in theory. The only problem is that God is already where you're headed. And if Jeremy really is saved and belongs to the Lord then the Lord already has ownership of him and may do what it takes to get him back. My heart is broken for the peace he's missing out on, the joy of having the Lord direct his steps and the assurance of salvation. Pray for him that God would meet him where he's going and that Jeremy would realize the Answer he seeks is already within him.

I've felt YUCK all week. I feel like I'm constantly moving and never accomplishing enough. It's exhausting! I haven't even been to the gym all week so I'm headed there after work tonight and maybe that will boost my energy!

Thanks for asking about the new dog. Shine is doing really well. All 3 dogs were running around the backyard chasing each other the other day. I love it when they wear themselves out! :)

I will update the booklist soon. I seriously have about 6 started at the moment. Again-focus troubles! :) Hope you all are having a good week. Praying God would meet you and love you right where you are.

Brenda

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