July Book of the Month

Well the bad news is I'm getting this to you the LAST day of the month, the good news is this book just released today! I know nothing about this book except it's supposed to be good so I'll be reading it right along with you. I started it at the gym last night and it looks good. We'll find out together. Happy Reading!

My sweet friends

Hello my sweet blog world! I'm back and I'm promising to be a better blogger. I'll wait while you do a little cheer :)

Be warned this might also be a random assortment of facts. I know you love it.

First of all I went to see My Sister's Keeper last night. Obviously I read the book by Jodi Piccoult since she's one of my favorite authors in the secular market. I have not cried in a movie since I saw Hope Floats - until last night! It was unbelievably sad and sooooo good. I'll excuse the producers of the film for changing the ending because it was that good. It should go without saying now that the book was better, but it was still good. And now I'm officially on Movie Hiatus while I spend 10 weeks in Bible study during my regularly scheduled movie night.

Speaking of - Bible study starts Tuesday night! I'm so excited and still a little overwhelmed with the last minute details of getting my house in order! I need to be super productive tonight with cleaning and then I'll feel better. If you think about it pray for these wonderful women that God would meet us right where we are and change us from there to be more like Him!

Apparently I'm destined to write a book. This morning a girl ran into the back of my car. It was like the scene from a sitcom I promise you. She's late for class and tells the officer that she needs to run and take her test real quick (WHAT?). She lost her license at a bar and didn't report it (WHAT?). And she was so young I pretty much felt like her mom telling her she probably should wait for the police, she probably can get a new license plate and she should probably be thankful the officer didn't rush her to jail for not having a license! I even suggested she call her professor and tell her why she's not in class taking her test right now. What can I say - I'm friendly like that! Thankfully the PT Crusier convertable is built like a tank. Not even a scratch. Her car-not built like a tank-enough said :)

Only if you wear contact lenses will you appreciate this, but this morning I was at the eye dr. and they have FINALLY created an eye drop that you can use whether you have your contacts in or not. I have really dry eyes and I stay awake all the time so I'm a big fan of eye drops. For years I've had drops for contacts and drops for without. Until today my friends! I'm going home to throw away every random bottle I have and invest a small fortune in Systane Ultra Eye Drops. Yippee! Plus they work really well so far so that's a plus.

Again I got to go to church on Sunday! You just don't know what a gift that is and it's even better that it comes after about 1/2 my weekend is over with. God is good good good. The sermon was on Peter and John. I'm pretty sure Peter and I would have been better friends but I so love the John people in my life. It was a great sermon, good company and great encouragement for the rest of the weekend.

okay, have to get back to work. Book reviews coming soon! Hope you're having a good day!

Brenda

Bad Blogger

Please don't give me the bad blogger award! I'm so sorry. Life has been so far beyond hectic it's not even funny! If you miss the blog at all know that I miss it 100 times more! I love it here and I promise to do better for my own mental health and yours! Here's a quick update about what I've been up to.

I'm starting the Beth Moore Esther study at my house in about a week and a half. Lots of cleaning and rearranging going on to make sure there's enough room for everyone! Plus planning snacks, etc and taking time to pray for my sweet group has been rewarding and time consuming in a good way. I'll be glad to have the first lesson under our belt and really get into the study. Everyone coming to the study is just as busy as me so if you feel like it please pray that God would supernaturally give us the time to be together and complete the work that we have. Thanks!

Oh and I've been working of course!

And bathing dogs because it's 104 degrees and they like to roll around in the mud!

And a bunch of other stuff. I promise to get back to a regular blogging schedule soon. June book reviews are coming up!

Talk to you soon!
Brenda

church

For those of you who attend wonderful churches every Sunday let me just tell you - you are blessed! I know you take it for granted because I used to do it almost every Sunday! I hardly ever get to church because of having to cover the hospital on Sundays. But, yesterday I got to go! Oh, it was wonderful. I appreciated it in a million different ways. The pastor's sermon was right on target for where I am right now and the fellowship spoke volumes to my weary soul. I've been so encouraged since then. I know I won't be able to go every Sunday because my responsibilites at the hospital keep me there sometimes, but I'm going to enjoy EVERY opportunity I have to worship there with other believers. I loved it!! Appreciate your church and the body of believers where you live. It's truly a gift :) Happy Monday!

balance

I'm not a fan of balance. I'm not even kinda good at keeping balance in my life. By nature I stay out of balance. I like to stay up late even though I have to get up early. I like to get up early even though I could use the extra sleep. I like to stay at the gym for 2 hours even if it means I won't be able to walk tomorrow. I like to have LOTS of fun when I have fun and spend time with all the people I love all the time even if it means neglecting other important things. I like to have long conversations as often as possible. I live wide open-by nature.

This week I have noticed in many obvious ways, this isn't working at the moment. I started the week by going to the gym at 5:30 A.M. on Monday morning. WHAT? I did just work all weekend! By lunch I was ready for bed. I was glad Monday night to have the gym out of the way but it made for a long out of balanced feeling afternoon.

Tuesday I had the most wonderful day off! I loved sleeping in, hanging out, playing with the dogs, taking a nap, running some errands, etc. I had planned to do some yard work but seriously-it's over 100 degrees here and for a girl who wears black all the time, that won't work! I was not so secretly excited that I didn't have to. I finished the night with dinner and coffee with my sweet friend Erin and some really good God conversation.

I don't even remember Wednesday!

Thursday I went to work and out with a friend and got home late and stayed up too late!

Worked today and sigh, I'm at work now for the weekend not in anyway rested! It's going to be a long weekend. I'm thankful that this is not a surprise to the Lord. I've wanted to only spend time with Him this week and that hasn't happened to the degree I'd hoped for. I've been non-stop working on the fruit of the spirit which just might kill me. I can't tell you how many times this week I did NOT have a comment - yeah for God! If this keeps up I'm not going to have anything to say!! :) It's been good. Hard and devestatingly painful to realize how quickly we get off track with Him, but still good.

And thank you for praying for the bible study starting at my house July 7th. God is in the group that is coming and I'm so excited to see what He has for them and for me. He's so kind to use us even when we feel the least effective! Please pray for the women who are coming that are hurting and/or in a dry season with the Lord that they would find refreshment and renewal in these times together.

And now I must get to work for the weekend! Sorry I have not been in touch this week. It's been crazy! I'm praying that this weekend holds many eternal moments that you won't miss and that your life is encouraged and changed by every single one of them!

Have a great weekend!
brenda

What a difference a week makes

Wow, I wish I could adequately document how much more peaceful my life is this Sunday than last Sunday. I so wish it was possible to anticipate every spiritual twist and turn our lives will take so that we can be ready for them. I felt so blindsided last week by a total lack of assurance and confidence of my faith. I felt like Satan was not only winning, but had laid claim to victory over the peace and power in my life. Devestatingly lonely.

And I can't put my finger on one specific thing that has made all the difference this week. I am, however, super glad that I was proactive. A pastor was a huge help as well as a trusted Christian friend. I think sometimes just exposing what we perceive as darkness to the light is powerful in itself. And there is tremendous freedom in the light.

I'm looking forward to new spiritual adventures. I'm starting a Bible Study at my house in July. I'm taking this Tuesday off from work to have some necessary rebuilding time with the Lord. I'm hopeful again that there is a future and a hope for all who trust in Him. And I'm thankful for all that and more.

And I really don't know why I feel like adding this today, but I do so here ya go. I've always believed it's important to have your spiritual life spread out a bit. It's never good to have all your spiritual confidence or opinions or go to in one Christian. It's a problem when that person fails that you will fail too. Which is why when I hit a spiritual cliff I'm careful to discuss it with at least 2 or 3 trusted people who can offer insight from the Lord and not just one person. This last little episode has taken several people's patient ears to fall upon a solution that works for my life. And I'm grateful for all of them.

Happy Sunday!
Brenda

what a week

It's been a crazy good, bad, unsettling, happy week-in that order. I could go on for days, but I'm tired of typing and that's just the truth. God is at work not just in my life, but in yours too. I'll get my thoughts together for some good posts next week. Hold tight! Have a wonderful, God filled weekend. He loves you! Brenda

soul talk

Have you ever had one of those weeks that makes you remember where your soul is? I'm telling you if you gave me a knife and a bunch of medicine I could cut it flat out of somewhere in my abdomen this week and show it to you. I can feel it. It's growing and it's killing every last ounce of me in the process. I can't give you all the details because A. It's way more than you'd want to know about me and B. Some things are meant to just be Jesus and Brenda, but I can tell you that I've had to repeat over and over and over this week, "This ends well for us." Because I've wondered a little bit if I believed it! Well, of course I believe it, but sometimes me head gets seriously in the way of what the Lord is doing.

I cannot tell you how thankful I have been in the past 3 weeks for Godly counsil. Godly people who are excited to hear my ramblings, who pray great believing prayers over my life and have the wisdom from the Lord to back up their thoughts on certain things. And I'm so thankful for the transparency the Lord has given me to share these things with others. There is freedom in the light my friends! Painfully wonderful freedom. And I'm a HUGE believer that you don't need to throw up all your junk on anyone who will listen, but there are times in our lives when God provides a safe open door to walk through and it's worth taking.

And before you all ask me crazy questions - there's no major discrepency in my life. Don't even think of what it could be because it's nothing major and before I know it people will ask me if I'm pregnant! Goodness people can make some stuff up! I love when you put unspoken on the prayer request list and all the sudden people just KNOW what's going on in your life. Ha!

If you'll let me just say it this way - It's enough little things that are starting to have a major effect on some other things. I'm flat scared to death to put a crack in my relationship with the Lord so I'm super motivated to fix them now and not when it's an even bigger deal.

And He is so wonderful to meet us RIGHT where we are. I have run into him 100 different times in 100 different ways in the last few weeks and at least to me it's His way of whispering, "I'm right here." He knows how I got here, he knows the lessons to learn while I'm here and He knows where I'm going.

If I could have a prayer request (2 in one week-yikes!), I have some "divine appointments" scheduled next week and I know they're divine appointments because Satan is working over time to make sure none of them happen. One is for me and the others are people who have asked to speak to me about issues in their lives. Please pray that God would make a way for these conversations to occur. Thank you!

Lord, even as our souls expand to make room for more of you, you're healing the growing pains. You amaze me with your love everyday. Amen

Tuesday book review

Since I promised not to use Robert Benson as a bookclub author (why did I do that?), I'll have to use his books that I love as book reviews! I finished this a few weeks ago and naturally I loved it. Here's some highlights.

-I am in search of enough good days to make a life.

-See life in 4 pieces (prayer, rest, community, and work)

-How we spend our day is of course how we spend our lives-Annie Dillard

-For even though I am not called to live the life of a monk, I am called to live a life that becomes the gospel.

-Way of learning to balance the areas of my life so that I might actually become a person of prayer.

-I began to see that one might construct a way of living that no longer separated one's spirtual life from the rest of one's life.

-Day by day remind yourself that you are going to die.

It's a great book, but seriously, did we expect anything less from Robert Benson? I didn't think so!

:)

Home Sweet Home

My Ella came home from the vet last night! Man I missed that little girl. She seems tired, but doing better. I laid down with her early last night and slept FOREVER! I needed some extra rest and so did she! So glad she's home. Dr. Martin has already called twice this morning to check on her. He's so wonderful! Welcome home sweet girl!

1st drop of rain

I loved this book and I'm so glad so many of you did too. As promised, here are my observations! And can I just say that I'm always on the lookout for great books to share with people who are struggling with one thing or another. This is one of those books. I like books that don't make excuses for our humanity but allows for the missteps of one in the human condition.

I'll make these by chapter and trust me, these are only the best ones. I could put the whole book on here!

1. Nothing can belong to us, even our own experiences, unless we understand it.

2. I don't need to know every answer. I just need, for a moment to get my head above these current circumstances. This is where I live-between the wasteland and the rain.

3. These are people who's eyes are open who don't see a thing. Mark 4:12

7. "It ain't no use putting your umbrella up-until it rains!"

9. What about this process is important to God? Is my role silence or speech? Is my presence significant or insignificant?

12. We are closest to God in the darkness, stumbling along blindly-Madeline L'Engle

13. Our prayers are an invitation to God to enter our souls with exactly the right amount of soap to break up the tension

19. 1 Peter 1:8-9 You never saw him, yet you love him. You still don't see him, yet you trust him-with laughter and singing. Because you kept on believing, you'll get what you're looking forward to-total salvation.

28. My presence will go with you. I'll see the journey to the end. Exodus 33:12-14

I'm so glad you enjoyed this book and found so many ways to relate it to your own life. I could go on for hours about how each one of these has been so meaningful in my life the last few weeks. Enjoy your June Reading!

brenda

shooooooooooooot!

With all the drama of Ella I totally forgot my notes for the 1st drop of rain. it's finally time to post and I can't! Please forgive me. Tomorrow. I promise. P.S. Ella's coming home at 5. She worked up quite a bill, but is feeling better. Anyone need a kidney? :) Happy Monday!