soul talk

Have you ever had one of those weeks that makes you remember where your soul is? I'm telling you if you gave me a knife and a bunch of medicine I could cut it flat out of somewhere in my abdomen this week and show it to you. I can feel it. It's growing and it's killing every last ounce of me in the process. I can't give you all the details because A. It's way more than you'd want to know about me and B. Some things are meant to just be Jesus and Brenda, but I can tell you that I've had to repeat over and over and over this week, "This ends well for us." Because I've wondered a little bit if I believed it! Well, of course I believe it, but sometimes me head gets seriously in the way of what the Lord is doing.

I cannot tell you how thankful I have been in the past 3 weeks for Godly counsil. Godly people who are excited to hear my ramblings, who pray great believing prayers over my life and have the wisdom from the Lord to back up their thoughts on certain things. And I'm so thankful for the transparency the Lord has given me to share these things with others. There is freedom in the light my friends! Painfully wonderful freedom. And I'm a HUGE believer that you don't need to throw up all your junk on anyone who will listen, but there are times in our lives when God provides a safe open door to walk through and it's worth taking.

And before you all ask me crazy questions - there's no major discrepency in my life. Don't even think of what it could be because it's nothing major and before I know it people will ask me if I'm pregnant! Goodness people can make some stuff up! I love when you put unspoken on the prayer request list and all the sudden people just KNOW what's going on in your life. Ha!

If you'll let me just say it this way - It's enough little things that are starting to have a major effect on some other things. I'm flat scared to death to put a crack in my relationship with the Lord so I'm super motivated to fix them now and not when it's an even bigger deal.

And He is so wonderful to meet us RIGHT where we are. I have run into him 100 different times in 100 different ways in the last few weeks and at least to me it's His way of whispering, "I'm right here." He knows how I got here, he knows the lessons to learn while I'm here and He knows where I'm going.

If I could have a prayer request (2 in one week-yikes!), I have some "divine appointments" scheduled next week and I know they're divine appointments because Satan is working over time to make sure none of them happen. One is for me and the others are people who have asked to speak to me about issues in their lives. Please pray that God would make a way for these conversations to occur. Thank you!

Lord, even as our souls expand to make room for more of you, you're healing the growing pains. You amaze me with your love everyday. Amen